| hokay |
[Wednesday
January 28th, 2009
4:44pm] |
My brain functions.
I see things.
I'm pretty smart actually.
And my friends love me.
Just give it up already.
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| soon i will be invincible |
[Wednesday
January 21st, 2009
6:14pm] |
its awesome...
i'm bored.
Thanks to my two ladies for making something worthwhile.
You should know i care about you because i, occasionally, do the dishes.....occasionaly...but it does mean something.
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| before i forget |
[Wednesday
January 7th, 2009
2:39am] |
as tacky as it may sound i've been flirting with a british online.
we argue about star trek in a cute way!
even though we will never meet, have phone or cyber sex, or, most likely, speak on the phone, i get a little butterflyish when i see i get a message..
damn eighth grade me!
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| florida.....in fragments |
[Wednesday
January 7th, 2009
2:25am] |
To begin with, Florida is a swamp, and, as such, I have had ample opportunity to become quite-well acquainted with the locals: humidity, bugs, and snakes. Not that I would prefer to freeze my nads off in the hoth-like tundra that all my homies in Michigan are dealing with, but I am proufoundly certain that I am in fact made of a rare form of snow that must avoid direct sunlight lest it burns. Furthermore, I love my father very much despite all that shit with the not being there. However, I do not think I can deal with his empty nest syndrome any longer.
I've made some bad decisions I think.
oooops.
But, what is life without a sprinkling of bad decisions? Bland Flan!!!!
Disco!
I am become death. Or not.
I got a bad haircut.
I'm not drunk and i should be.
mr. wind-up bird
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|
|
[Tuesday
November 18th, 2008
4:32pm] |
|
chicago rocked .....it rolled....it was neat...i met my aunts Hawaiian...she was sweet.
|
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| korea |
[Monday
November 17th, 2008
12:55am] |
|
there is a Korean in my apartment.....and a black chick.......yeah but there is only one other person here....riddle me this........hi
|
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| hrmmmm |
[Sunday
September 21st, 2008
12:43am] |
sometimes you just need to acknowledge it....so here it goes.
im not okay.
i havent been.
but im really not now.
i am really not okay.
i dont know what to do and im not asking for advice because honestly none of you can give me the advice i need.
i love you all.
i dont know what to do
im just so incredibly not okay.
i dont know how else to put it.
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| arg |
[Thursday
July 31st, 2008
5:00am] |
my father is like a child.
you know erin said it and i always brushed it off but it really does seem like my family would rather me be close then succeed. bastards.
snywhooool....sapa wants me to be there on the 21st which i might not be able to pull off. so i might get kicked out....but goddamn it i want to sell no zebra bracelets and fight the good fight and all that.
speaking off danis old roomate tried out too and was telling me one day about the answers she gave to the questions and.......what the fuck.
also angie...apparently i cancelled my room reservation a month ago so......yeah...whether i can afford it or not i'm moving in i think...i'll try really hard not to fuck you over....but i told you the sitch so you know.... but i'm going to make it work...also we need to apply for bridge cards like whoah...i should have like two hundred bucks when i get there with another hundred on the way.....
and my dad's ex might give me five hundred dollars....wooot....also i need to get an appointment with biolife set up time to make a mother fuckin fone call...
sappa training are the weekends of mid september and its friday five to ten and saturday and sunday eight to ten and well thats gonna suck...no drinking that weekend ...well ..thursday....
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| oh babies |
[Saturday
July 26th, 2008
12:40pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
tell me something good |
] |
so things are looking up.....i'm rounding a corner bitches....wooot.
i don't know whats going on with school but i'm reaching a crazy calm and it is wonderful.
i've accepted the whole being single thing........but she's already looking
i'll be fine until she finds someone......and then......one of you bitches better get me drunk and most importantly get me HOME!!!!!!!! cause i don't need any more mistakes.
anywho a couple of realizations.
a. in general we are fucking awesome and everyone wants to be us....
i say this because there is so much we do that gets picked up by others
and usually twisted in some way that makes us find something else that is
totally awesome till someone takes control of that...speaking off we need to
talk about promecia my bitches...we must talk.
b. this whole ignoring problems thing that i do is not healthy....physically or mentally.
c. i tend to fall, to hard, to fast, and because i make myself (what is that all about)
so we are all going to stop me from jumping into bed with someone and proclaiming my
everlasting love to them cause i need to stop getting myself and other people all kinds
of hurt because i'm afraid or dying alone or something who knows.
|
|
| ........................ |
[Wednesday
July 16th, 2008
3:48am] |
so i was bored and i was just like going through you-tube looking at videos and stuff and cracking up when i started to watch a hole bunch of interviews...geraldo vs. bill o'riely, marlyn manson vs. bill o'riely, tom cruise vs. matt lauer.
which led to a scientology spree when i became physically ill.
i was watching a video called the unfunny truth about scientology and they started to talk about lisa mc pherson, and how she spending so much money on the church and how she expressed desires to leave to friends and family when she was in a car accident and when paramedics removed her from the vehicle to find that she was okay she began to take her clothes off and was taken to the hospital to receive psychiatric care. two scientologist came and talked to her and she declined care and went with them.
the next time she was seen she was dead.
the showed the picture of what she looked like when she was taken in. i almost vomitted.
she had been starved and denied fluids for up to ten days, cockroaches had been feeding upon her body.
at first i thought it was just propoganda until i started to search the internet. and there are fucking news articles about it.
the church of scientology was charged in her death and was aquitted after the medical examiner recanted her testimony.
they showed some other things in the video that i wont forget soon. like a man how had drowned in scalding water and was missing some of his skin.
not to think that im easily swayed, i've spent all day today looking up shit and .........its fucking ridiculouls.
operation snow white-it sounds like bullshit, it sounds ridiculous, but you can find the news about the convictions....time magazine stories on it.
south park poked fun but its way scary.
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| shrlojos |
[Saturday
July 12th, 2008
11:57am] |
so.....i'm twiddling my thumbs here.....
my job hasn't started yet and i so need to start working its ridiclous...every dollar i make puts me closer to being able to live when i get up there and every dollar i don't pushes me further away from it. fuck.
i'm calling angee today so if you're not at work girl expect a call.
i miss my boo, and i'm waiting to stop but it just aint happening , i tried to take my mind of it but i can't cause i don't do anything all day so...i don't sleep very much at all with the exception of every couple days when i crash and sleep in excess of 18 hours....what the fuck.....
anyways...blah...i'll be in michigan soon and i'll be in classes and that will be much better.
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| yay avoiding the inevitable |
[Tuesday
July 8th, 2008
2:10am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
take a guess |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
i love you and buddha too |
] |
okay so its official now....
facebook finality falls like a hammer.
yeah.
so i'm sorry if i've been a little hard to get a hold of but you know.
i'm trying not to deal with it cause everytime i think about it
i get sick all up in my gut.
so....you know...
we'll see how i deal with this all.
this fucking sucks arrrgggg.
anywho..i love you alls and i think i'm going to bed......
also i reset my status to single on okcupid and all the fatties are saying whats up....what the fuck is up with that...........
seriously
|
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| i am a leaf on the wind watch how i soar |
[Thursday
July 3rd, 2008
2:45am] |
...life sucks
....the universe hates me
....but it does feel a bit liberating
....but way more shitty
....i still love her
....i still think that it could work out
....i was going to marry her
....life sucks so hard right now
....i'm of to steal my dads liquor
....i'm single again
....fuck
|
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| fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck |
[Friday
June 27th, 2008
12:36am] |
i made her cry.
i feel like shit.
i can't help it.
i had a job offer with good hours, okay pay, and daily tips. i have to take it right...i mean...i have to right?
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
this is so not good.
so very not good
i feel like blowing my brains out...
i told her i'd turn it down if we would be okay
and she told me to do what i thought best.
and long story short, whats best for me is this job
i need to make the money i need for my credit card and
school
i need to make the money.
i need the fucking money.
i need the fucking money.
i hate money
what the hell am i going to do if she leaves me.
what the hell am i going to do.
she has to understand
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|
| ha |
[Thursday
June 26th, 2008
2:37am] |
my skin is the color of a nice boiled ham....
i hate the sun.
that bitch thinks he knows everything and that everyone loves him so much but you know what.
he totally kills dogs and kids that get left in cars and starts brushfires..
that bitch.
i hate him.
thats all for now.
|
|
| nightly nightly |
[Monday
June 23rd, 2008
4:54am] |
i cunt sleep aht uhhlll....thats muh british typing accent.....its full of power and attractiveness and mispellings alls ovah thuh place
i need to make three thousand dollars in two months....ill be lucky if i can make eight hundred.
so hear it is.
help me. anyone who knows of any job that pays decently needs only to call my ass up and i will give out back massages, hugs, and if your lucky lapdances..
so yeah....
in other news....
i'm going to start some kind of new work out eat right fitness extravaganza.....
and...im going to sing to small children on the street whilst dressed as a raccoon.....
because i want to.
|
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| gahhhhhhhrrrr |
[Sunday
June 22nd, 2008
4:13am] |
not to bitch...but apparently i don't have the right to plan things out
because as i draw it out with one hand
someone else just erases it.
i swear to god.
i came down here because i was told that i was hooked up with a job.
and nothing.
i had to get a job because the job i was promised fell through.
what the fuck.
afl;jalfkjasl;kfjasl;kfjd
i swear to god this is bullshit the guy at movie gallery told me that i pretty much had a job and because of my prior experiance began to talk to me about management oppurtunities and then never fucking called...
have i gone mad.
have i always been this fucking unlucky.................heh....
i guess i really didnt have to ask that...welll fuck...
i'm done....i'm done
i'm sick and tired of working like a dog to get myself where i need to be...or worrying about whether or not i'll be able to pay for school and shit.
fuck it alllllllllllll
im just going to travel along doing what the fuck i want when the fuck i want if ican afford it...illl drive a god damned school bus.....oh wait....i fucking can't because everyone who promises to teach me just leaves me hanging...and i know its not their responsiblity but don't tell me you'll doing something and then not...jsut say you won't
so janitorial work it is...fuck yeah
rich the janitor.......
hopefully if i do a real good job the owner of the company i clean will give me a bottle of vodka for cjhrist mas
yes.
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| i feel loved |
[Sunday
June 15th, 2008
2:52am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 loved |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
province- tv on the radio |
] |
two offers of a place to stay.
it will be hard to tell my dad i could be leaving.
things are different this time around.
no decisions till i get my extra aide and shit.
also....i'm being trained as a bartender
and....i can breath fire now.
i know im awesome.
i need a fucking job so bad i dont know what im going to do.
i got an offer to try out for the greenville city slam team.
i cant do it.
but it would have been awesome.
i hate money.
someone win the lotto and fucking hook me up.
i feel a bit like im wasting away.
also everyone should listen to tv on the radio and love them.
|
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| issss be hungray |
[Thursday
June 12th, 2008
4:22am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
dirtywhirl- tv on the radio |
] |
i've discovered the heart of the matter.....so thats something i guess
but now that its out there
dont know whats going to happen.
and we all know...i always need more uncertaintity i dont have enough of it..........
that was a joke.
i'm going to kill something electronic.
and then bring it back to life.
also...........i need more wine.
and a person.
|
|
| water park shinanagins |
[Monday
June 9th, 2008
1:08pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
the zutons -railroad |
] |
yay!!! water park....
the water park comes with a decision.
i need me time.
so im going to the water park...
and then tomorrow is go-carts and lazer tag.
hella-yeah
because i'm not worrying about it anymore.
no siree bob.....
and if you can't deal with that then fuck you.
boo-yah home skillet with a side of eggs.
also i am randy jackson.
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